No, 1971 is not the year I was born.
That is actually the year my parents got married, which makes them together for 48 years.
Today, January 30th is their wedding anniversary. I know some of you are thinking, WTF!! How is this chick scared of marriage and her parents have been together for 48 years!?!?!?!! You mean to tell me your father has loved your mother for 4 decades, almost 5 and stayed????? Girl stop playing with me!
I know.
I know.
It's because their marriage is rare, super rare. If I have to really count how many successful marriages that I know, I would only need my hands. But if I had to count how many unsuccessful marriages I know, I would need your hands too.
Let's just be honest the world we live in today no one wants to put in the work that is required for a healthy long lasting marriage. People don't understand that marriage is a full time job with overtime you don't get paid time and a half for. There are no sick days, vacation days or personal days You need to show up early and leave late. People have a very hard time committing to that. They forget about vowing for better or worse when the worse happens. They want the honeymoon phase to be permanent and when it's not, they find it hard to like their spouse so they decide to like someone else.
But this post is to thank my parents for loving each other even when they didn't like each other. Thank you for never giving up on your commitment even when you wanted to. Thank you for honoring your vows to each other not just when it was easy, but when it was the most difficult. Thank you for surrounding yourself with people that encouraged you to stay together rather than let go. I remember my dad telling me a story about how he almost threw in the towel with my mom. Him & my mom were having a troublesome time and he ran to Philly to get away. He went there to complain about her to my Grandpa and call it quits. But my Grandpa told him to take his ass back to his wife and work it out. Maybe he didn't say ass, but I definitely want to believe he did. But anyway, how many marriages would still be working if they surrounded themselves with people like that?! And not only have people like that in their lives but listen to them, take their advice and save their marriage. Everyone goes through thick times, everyone wants to surrender at some point, but not everyone makes the decision to push through. So thanks mom and dad for making the decision to fight for your marriage and for us.
My parents persevered and as a result they get to look back at the life they've created over the last 48 years and thank God they didn't leave each other. My dad looks at my mom everyday and tells her he doesn't know where he would be without her. He jokes that he would be one of those bums on the side of the road still trying to find his way. LOL. It brings me to tears to watch them care for each other in such a way it makes me believe in fairytales. So today and everyday I celebrate them because I know it was hard work to stay devoted to one another and not give up when things were challenging.
So yeah my parents have been married for 48 years and I am scared to death of marriage, I borderline don't trust it. But it's all good because when I see my parents appreciation for each other, it makes me believe again. Then I find out John Gray has been cheating on his wife with a mistress that sometimes stays in their same hotel with voicemails to prove it and he may have a love child and I give up again. I guess today we are having tea for breakfast. Such is life.
#dearMom&Dad Happy Anniversary!